Second verse, (almost) same as the first…

The second attempt at layered curriculum was better than the first.  I’ve had several students tell me that they were overwhelmed by what seemed like a ton of work the first time around, so instead of just chipping away at it little by little, they just decided to skip it entirely.  I can’t understand that mentality with respect to school, but I do realize that that’s exactly how I treat housework.  Sometimes it’s too overwhelming, so I just sit and watch television instead.  Anyway, this time, they did a layered unit without knowing it.  I surprised them with the news on the last day of the unit.  They groaned at first, but then we looked over the assignments together and they realized they’d already completed most of it.

Despite the increased success, I had lots of failures this last six weeks.  This is only a one-semester course, and there are several that I already know I’ll have back in my class next semester.  It’s a little disheartening.  Well, okay, it’s actually a lot disheartening.  I just have to keep trying to do things better.

However, there are some positive things going on.

The first is that I am munching on Cheetos Puffs.  Muy delicioso!

The second is that the fact that this is only a one-semester class means that I get to revamp my lessons soon!  It’s nice to get to retool things in the same year, rather than having to wait an entire year like you do in a year-long course.

There are other things that are keeping me chipper right now, but the parent meeting I have to go to in about 6 minutes is not one of them.  This particular student is a senior (or an early-graduating junior) who turned in one assignment in my class for the entire 2nd six weeks.  sigh.

I will try to post again soon with more positives.  It’s such a festive time of year – it’s good to focus on cheerful things!

Anything fun going on in your lives?  Any successes with your students that really stand out?  I’d love to hear about them.

They say a messy desk is a sign of intelligence.

And if that’s true, I’m a total genius.

I can see about two square feet of my desk. The rest of it is covered in books, paper, pens, miniature clocks with movable hands, etc. And it’s not even in piles – it’s just tossed on my desk like some sort of typhoon moved through.

I have wanted to write a new post for about a month, but I have a lot going on that the rest of the world doesn’t really need to know about. Some things have happened in my family that are distracting me right now. Perhaps I’ll be able to share more at some point.

Anyway, a couple of weeks ago I gave my Government students my very first attempt at a layered curriculum. It worked well for some; most of them, however, accomplished very little. I had to have the “No, you cannot turn it in tomorrow; I’ve already extended your deadline; next time you’ll have to work on it rather than goof off” chat with more than a few.  I am not sure what they thought would happen if they didn’t do the assignments…. I’ve decided that because they’re seniors and because we’re turning them loose on the world in eight months, I’m really doing them a disservice if I let them get away with not doing anything. I’m not afraid to keep them in high school an extra semester – or even an extra year – if it helps them be better prepared for life and the demands of a boss in the long run.

But I still hate telling them “no.” I have to get over that. I have to be okay with them failing when it’s legitimate. It’s something I go back and forth on – especially when their sweet little faces are practically begging me to take a paper. Sometimes it’s easy. But sometimes, like last week, it counts for a major grade and their lack of effort is going to cause them to fail. They have to participate if they want to graduate, and I need to figure out what I can do to make them want to participate.

Around the same time in AP Government, we had a “class debate” about the Electoral College.  I say “class debate” because really, it was more of a one-sided conversation by one student and the rest of the kids just sort of let this particular student dominate.  I tried to involve them as best as I could, but it just wasn’t happening.  I ended up asking a pro from down the hall to come speak during our next class about the need for the Electoral College today and enjoyed his lecture very much.  I was impressed that my kids asked him a lot of good questions, but I’m left wondering why they don’t ask me questions….

Generally, I feel I’m in a bit of a rut right now and I need help digging myself out.

On the plus side, I started another layered unit with my Government students late last week – only this time, I didn’t tell them!  I’m just giving them the assignments one by one, and when they finish the C Layer (as early as next class), I’ll surprise them with the news.  I made sure to put some really fun activities in the A Layer and some interesting (but less fun) activities in the B Layer to encourage them to work for a higher goal.  We’ll see how it goes.

Went to my best friend’s wedding over the weekend and it was fabulous.  She’s on her honeymoon now – which is why I suddenly find myself with time to blog.

A List, Thursday-Style

Last night I had lots of things rolling around in my head and I think the time has come for me to get them out.  I have tons to do this weekend (tomorrow is the last day of the six weeks) and I need to be able to focus.  Shall I use numbers or bullets today?

• I have Monday off.  I didn’t know this until two days ago, and it THRILLS me.  I’m definitely ready for a break.
• I’m not too amused by the last-minute “What do I need to do to pass?” emails I’ve been getting from students.  I needed them to care about this three weeks ago, when they received their progress reports and could have actually done something about it.
• Yesterday I saw the Ron Mueck exhibit at the Modern in Fort Worth.  It was beyond fabulous.
• My grades are due on Tuesday, but I don’t want to spend the weekend working on them.  I’d like to have them done by tomorrow evening.
• We had to discuss lockdown procedures at yesterday’s marathon faculty meeting.  It made me a little sick to my stomach.  We’re going to have a drill – which is good, because we all need to know what to do – but I’m a little freaked out about the whole concept.
• A bright spot in the meeting?  Finding out that our school has the poorest kids in the district.  This is good news because we also happen to have the highest-performing students in the district.  It shows that we’re doing something right.  (Mind you, we already knew this.  It’s just nice to have confirmation on paper.)

What about you?  Any cool stuff going on in your classrooms/lives?

Happy Thoughts

The mood swing, mercifully, was on its way out shortly after I wrote my last post.  Now that I’ve had a couple of days, I’d like to mention some positive aspects of Saturday’s experience.

First of all – SURPRISE! – the training wasn’t a waste of time!  I learned a few things, and I’d like to highlight some of them here.

1) We learned about extension menus.  Basically, it’s a tic-tac-toe board (or bingo card) with different levels of questions about a particular topic.  Students can choose any row horizontally, vertically, or diagonally.  I like that it stretches their brains but also gives them choices.

2) The average age of the people in that room was…well, let’s just say I was definitely the youngest person there.  Considering I’ve only been doing this job for 5 weeks and two days….  I’m going to be fine.

3) I talked to a veteran teacher and posed the same questions I asked in my post.  He reassured me that I probably wouldn’t feel like I had “Differentiation in the AP Classroom” under any semblance of control until I’d been doing it at least seven years (give or take).

By Saturday afternoon, I’d let myself off the hook a little.  (And I will also admit that my world got a whole lot sunnier after the delicious Subway sandwich I ate for lunch.)

Then on Sunday, a coworker left the funniest comment EVER in response to my post, and that pretty much sealed the deal:

I’m going to be a good teacher.  I might not be one of the world savers referenced in this article, but, like this gal, I’m not going to give up on my students either.  I’ll find a nice balance – just maybe not right now, this six weeks, or even this year.

And I’m okay with that.

My First Day of AP Training

This has been a difficult day so far.  We’re discussing differentiation strategies for the AP classroom.  Most of it is completely over my head.  This is what frustrates me about staff development: it’s all about where I should be.  I want to take this information and interpret it as a goal, as something to aim for, as something that will take time and practice to reach.  But this morning, it’s just coming across as an area where I’m falling short.

I kind of want to scream, “I get it already!”  I know that a good teacher does all of these things most – or all – of the time.  But please give me time to get my head around all of this information and figure out what it looks like in my classroom.  Please stop making me attend all kinds of overwhelming training sessions that I don’t feel like I get anything out of because I haven’t even mastered all of the content yet.

Admission: of the 7 chapters my class has read in AP Government, I’ve read one.  ONE.  And not even very thoroughly.  I’ve been too busy with planning activities for that class, for my regular government classes, and for my world geography classes.  There just aren’t enough hours in the day for me to get everything done.

My question this morning is: Are my students being cheated because they have me as their teacher?  I am not looking for sympathy here (well, maybe a little because frankly, I’m just being a disgusting, whiny baby about being in staff development on a Saturday).  I want empathy, but more than that, I want honesty.

And here’s something else.  I absolutely loathe this particular subject area.  I really, truly couldn’t care less about government; I know (and appreciate) that we have one, I know how to find information about it, and I know about my options for participating.  Otherwise, really, it just doesn’t get me excited.  How do I work up enthusiasm for teaching it?  Or do I just accept that I find it dull, do it because they’ve told me to, and move on?  Isn’t that the kind of attitude that frustrates me about my students?

Will this feeling of inadequacy ever go away – or at least abate just a bit?  Am I destined to live with this sense of “falling short” for my entire life?

Am I in the right profession??

Becoming a Real Teacher

We’re through five weeks, two days, and two class periods of school.  Things are starting to settle into a routine, and I like that.

The last two years I’ve taught World and U.S. History.  This year, I have Government, World Geography, and AP Government.  It’s been really tough to wrap my head around three completely different classes, and the mental shift from 1st period Geography (with freshmen) to 2nd period AP Government (very high-level seniors) has been hard.  I’m proud of myself for making it all the way to Wednesday of last week before having a major (tear-inducing) meltdown.  I feel like a real teacher now.

It also helps that my tardiness has miraculously disappeared.  The last two years I’ve really struggled with getting to school on time.  (Don’t worry – I get definitely got here before my students came to class…most days, anyway.)  But this year, I haven’t had a problem.  When I started teaching, everyone said it isn’t until your third year that you really start to feel like you know what you’re doing.  That’s definitely turned out to be true for me; I feel like a responsible adult for the first time in my 27 years.

Anyway, yesterday I had a chance to do some reflecting on where I am in life.  I went with a couple of other teachers and their classes to the UT Dallas School of Behavioral and Brain Sciences.  My degree is in Psychology, so I was thrilled to be along for the fun.

We had a pretty full day; we started with a lecture, moved on to exploring career options with a Psychology degree, and then finally visited the laboratories and saw the kinds of work different research areas are doing in their respective fields.  As I took notes in the lecture, I couldn’t shake the foggy feeling in my brain.  It was like I’d been asleep for a very long time and parts of my brain I haven’t used in years were trying to wake up – and after yesterday’s talk, I know that’s probably exactly what was happening!  I just felt a little rusty, like I’d forgotten how to learn.

I’ve always thought that maybe someday I’d like to teach at the college/university level.  It would be nice to not have the state telling me what to do in my classroom.  Beyond that, in my current position, I often feel like I’m having to “dumb down” concepts for my students.  I don’t know if that’s because I just don’t understand the average high schooler’s mind or perhaps because I’m genuinely making things dumber.  In either case, I sometimes feel like my brain is starting to calcify.

Anyway, it was really nice to clear out some cobwebs in my brain and be a student again for a day.  I think I’m just about ready to go back to school and get that Master’s Degree.

Six Years Later

A few minutes ago, my husband started flipping channels on the television and he ended up on MSNBC. They’re showing “9/11 As It Happened.”

This afternoon, I decided it would probably be good for me to write something about it; it just seems wrong to pretend like I don’t know what today is. I feel like it was sort of the elephant in the room all day anyway.

On September 11, 2001, I was living with my parents in Colorado, having moved there in the months previous for my final year of college. My parents were watching the news, as they did every morning, when I heard my mother saying, “Oh my gosh! Oh my gosh!” from the living room. At the time, I was more concerned with why she needed to be yelling when I’d clearly just awakened. I ran into the living room wondering what could possibly be so important. It turned out she and my dad had just watched the second plane hit the World Trade Center.

I watched the immediate playback, and I remember the sinking feeling in the pit of my stomach as I realized it wasn’t just an accident.

The rest of the morning was chaos, even in our small town. Since we lived in the valley north of the city limits, I rushed into town to find my boyfriend (he later become my husband). I had the grim task of breaking the news to him and a group of our friends. On my way into town I’d heard about the Pentagon, the fourth “missing plane,” and reports of a bomb at the State Department. As I left, I heard the news that both towers had fallen. I remember sitting in my car thinking, “How is that possible? That can’t possibly be true.” And then the deejays said they had a television in the station, that they were watching the news, and that the twin towers were, literally, gone.

I remember the first estimates: that some 50,000 people worked in the Trade Center. That as many as 10,000 lives might be lost.

We heard from my brother. He was in the Air Force ROTC program at his university. He’d been walking to class when one of his fellow cadets stopped him and told him to go straight home and change his clothes. My brother had been in his uniform that morning, and in all the confusion – and with so many attacks taking place without warning – he was warned that his military uniform made him a potential target.

Friends in England emailed me to make sure I was okay, and to offer their messages of support to me – and, by extension, to all Americans. I knew that deep down, they knew I was fine. But I also realized how that email really represented the deep friendship our two nations share.

I thought about that day every day for the next year. I don’t know why I took it so personally; I just did. I think I was so struck by the animosity behind it – it was the first time I’d ever experienced something so profoundly hateful and so devastating to so many people.

I was relieved when the first anniversary passed without incident.

And now here we are, six years later. Watching the news tonight, I’ve really been struck by how innocent we were before that day. Just minutes ago, I watched the footage of the second plane hitting, and a reporter on the ground who’d witnessed it said something to the effect of, “I wonder if there’s a problem with air traffic control.”

This afternoon I came across this website. Mygooddeed.org was founded by friends and family of a man killed at the Trade Center on September 11. Remember how you felt in the days and weeks immediately following the attacks? Remember what it was like to be part of something bigger than yourself? To genuinely care about your neighbor? This site seeks to turn tragedy into triumph by recapturing the commitment to each other that we all felt in the autumn of 2001. It’s about making a pledge – either for September 11 or all year long – to do something for someone else for the betterment of humanity. I have been so moved by the good deeds people have planned for today – simple things like washing dishes and smiling at strangers on the street.

Times have changed. Whether we agree with the politics of these new times or not, I hope that we can honor the victims of September 11 by doing something positive in their memory.

Out of the Bubble

I’ve been reading Jeff Utecht (over at The Thinking Stick) for the last couple of days.  He’s been talking about what happens when we put students in a bubble – restricting their access to programs, websites, and the like.  Some interesting thoughts rolling around over there.

 Anyway, I am fortunate to be in a district that’s 1:1 at the high school level.  Today one of my government students was having major issues with his laptop.  (In fact, we’re on our way to see the campus technicians about it in just a moment.)  He wasn’t able to make a PowerPoint to go with his vocabulary assignment.

But he did the assignment anyway…

…on his iPhone.

iPhones in the bubble = SO COOL!

Happy

Last night I read a post that challenged me to take a break from the stress of school starting and list some things that make me happy right now. Like that post’s author, I’m going to leave out my husband, my dog, my friends, and my amazing school.

1. Weddings.

2. Michael Buble’s song, “Everything” and “I’m Not Who I Was” by Brandon Heath.

3. Talking smack in my fantasy football league.

4. Myspace and Facebook.

5. Shoes.

Indicative of the Whole Problem

I had just finished making my list of things to do before school starts when I came across this article on the web.

The article talks about a new dollar coin being issued by the U.S. Mint.  The coins will be similar to the state quarters in that each series will feature a different president along with his rank (ie, Thomas Jefferson, 3rd president).  Apparently, practically the entire population of the U.S. knows that George Washington was the first president, but almost nobody knows who came after him.  And my response to that is:

So what?

Of all the things to be concerned about these days, the Mint goes out and commissions a Gallup study to find out how many people can list the presidents in order.

Seriously?  We spent money on this?  Last I checked, Google was free.

To fix this “problem,” they’ve even put together lesson plans to go along with the new coins.

As if teachers have time….

One of these days, I’ll have something nice to say.